A Smiley Little Eskimo and Believing in Good Intentions

Today has pretty-much been the coldest it's been this season. The freezing wind is crippling. Your toes and fingers cringe and your skin literally hurts - yes, that kind of coldness. Alas, I needed to run some errands and I had put them off enough already. In front of our fireplace I dressed our smiley 5 month old in a good 3 layers, locked her in her car seat, added 2 thick blankets and a hat so that we could be on our way.  She was snug like a bug in a rug and she rather liked her warm cocoon.

At the store after grabbing the few things I needed we headed to the checkout. Everyone was at the store today, so busy. It was my turn in line and as the lady rang up my things our eyes met and I smiled.... She did not. She looked over into the stroller where my tiny perky Eskimo sat  and then told me my total. While sliding my card to pay the lady said to my baby "I'm sorry your mother brought you out in this weather". I kinda froze....I gave her a nod and a smile as she handed me my receipt without another word. Before heading out the door I covered the stroller in an extra blanket to keep Ivey from the wind still thinking about what that stranger- lady said.

Many thoughts went through my head and I kept thinking about what she said "I'm sorry your mother brought you out in this weather"..... I went from shock to anger to disbelief to hurt. Maybe she was having a bad day? Maybe she hates the cold weather? As humans, especially us women, we often linger our thoughts on why someone said what they said, why someone didn't do such an such or why someone did that thing or this thing. We often times immediately assume the worst in others intentions. We offer no grace in our judgement. I am guilty of doing this on many occasions. Maybe the lady was being rude and intended to make a jab at me? I want to believe her intentions were good.   Her choice of words were lacking but I don't always say the things I'm thinking in the right way either. Regardless, I'd like to encourage those who might want to interject or have some advice, knowledge, or wisdom they want to share with a young mother... Consider how you give it. Consider how you say it. I am always open and I welcome any wisdom seasoned mothers want to give or share with me, The Lord sure knows I can use it. But remember you were once also inexperienced and clumsily new at motherhood and offer grace.

Lastly, I would like to add that in the south people tend to think life stops when it gets so cold. I do believe people up north carry on with there daily lives, in negative degree weather might I add, with their children in-tow. It's doable and common. If your bundled up for the weather, why does life stop down here for "cold" weather? Interesting.

Let's all try to believe that others intentions are good. Let's be loving and gentle in how
We judge others motives, give the benefit of the doubt. Because on days when we are lacking and things fumble all wrong, we hope others do the same for us.  😊

A healthier you - a Happy Mama ❤️ (Making time for your health)

Let's be honest. Mamas are running on empty most of the time and somehow we manage to just get through the day. Barely. Heavy eyes and aches you didn't know you could have. How many Mamas are so easily snappy and cranky with no rest and sleep? If the baby cries one more time you just might burst into tears yourself. A lot is asked of us physically.
I felt groggy, foggy, and irritable most of the time and Ivey was 3 months old. I still felt puffy and flabby from the pregnancy and I wasn't doing anything about. At the end of September Trent and I joined our local YMCA and we also began the Paleo diet. Diving in head first - all at once. We determined to stick with it (which is a lot easier when you have a supportive and dedicated partner, thanks Hun). It wasn't long before I started realizing I was getting some energy back! I had a little bit more get-up and go and I felt happier. I'd missed this feeling, almost forgot what it felt like.
4 or 5 days a week we as a family go to the Y (they have a PlayCenter where we can leave Ivey for an hour or so). I love doing this TOGETHER with Trent, it's strengthened us more than just physically but also our relationship, it's something else we share together and work towards, just living healthier.
Exercising releases endorphins and we Mamas really need those endorphins! When days I just feel BLEH and think "I just don't wanna sweat and work", if I go I always feel better and am happier for it. I have energy to get things done during the day, a happier more energetic Mama to offer my daughter, and just an over-all better attitude. And Fridays are my favorite workout - Yoga! A nice relaxing time (and a hilarious little Asian instructor) after a long week.
I encourage you Mama's to find a way to be active (yes, we are all ACTIVE with our little one(s) but you know what I mean). To give your all to your family, friends, and to The Lord, you need to take care of yourself. It gives you a boost to getter-done! Take a Pilates class, a yoga class, go on a walk or run. Do Zumba or BodyPump. Sweat it out. No, it won't solve all your problems, you'll still be exhausted - that comes with the Mama card. Make better food choice, exercise, be a healthier you, be a healthier Mama. A Happy Mama ❤️

What do you do to be active?

Opportunities

Its been over a month since I wrote last. A little person and visits from friends and family have kept me quite occupied. There has been a few things I have thought writing about but this one has weighed heavy.

When I was a little girl I always heard "children are to be seen and not heard". At a woman of 22, I still take that on. And even being seen can sometimes be too much. Initiating a conversation has always been a struggle, especially with strangers. 5 years old and Mother couldn't even beg me to play in the balls on the McDonald's play ground - that was too overwhelming for me. I was probably 14 before I had enough courage to order my own meal at a restaurant instead of asking one of my parents or younger sister to for me.

18 and I took a big step to run for freshman class secretary at FC. Had no hopes, but knew I had to try. To my surprise, somehow, I won. That was mind boggling to this hermit-girl. That was a big step for me. Then getting married and moving to a new town really throws you on a stage. Its a deep battle within. I've learned to talk myself into things.... kinda like giving myself a pep-talk., "Just go to the event you will be glad you went in the end. you can do it.". Accepting invitations are sometimes difficult because committing to go be with a bunch of people is a huge task. Meeting visitors at church have always been a weakness...how can I, not awkwardly, greet and keep the conversation going? Having people into my home is a mountain to climb - which I've promised myself to invest in good climbing gear because that's something I want to get better at. I want to do hard things.

My prayers for years have often times included asking Him for help and opportunities to grow in this weakness. For courage and confidence. until a couple weeks ago I didn't realize that a new blessing could also be an opportunity. My daughter.

Babies get LOTS of attention. So much so that is almost frightening to an introvert like me. They get so much love and attention that comes like a swift breeze and Mama's filter it. That sometimes makes me more tired as I lay in bed at night; more-so than tending to a little one all day. I am afraid my daughter is an extrovert. Out-going and a engaging personality and sometimes it sure does make this Mamas heart go in her throat.

Wednesday are senior citizens day at Publix where I do most of our grocery shopping. I've always had a special kind of love for elderly people and guess what? Elderly people love babies. I've learned to plan to be in the grocery store well-over an hour on Wednesdays because we get constantly stopped by the sweet and curious white-haired ladies and jolly elderly men. They just grin and ask all about Ivey. The conversations often consist of them telling me about their grandbabies or great-grandbabies. I see the joy that Ivey brings them and the joy that lifts them when they talk of their own. Its special and humbling. Like I said before, talking to strangers are not my strong suite but here is the opportunity. Ivey doesn't know it yet but she is helping me a lot. She is challenging me in many ways. Being a Mama is hard but it also comes with many opportunities, and this kind of opportunity - though hard - is one I could use the most. Thankful for Ives. Thankful for sweet gracious people who open up their lives through the presence of a baby. Thankful for opportunities to share Christ. Thankful to Him.

All is Eucharisteo.

New Mom Discoveries

Ivey has been home for 12 days now. In those 12 days here are some Ivey facts and randomness I've discovered.....

* Baby laundry don't play. In other words: BABIES HAVE LOTS AND LOTS OF LAUNDRY. We go through multiple outfits a day, usually. But hey, it's cute tiny laundry ;)

* Being able to eat my lunch sometimes doesn't happen at lunch.... It could be at 2 or 3 in the afternoon. But Ives and I are working on the fact that if Mommy doesn't eat, then Ivey can't eat. So snacking is easier to juggle ;)

* You learn to do anything and everything with one hand. Maybe I am qualified to join the circus now?

* I was told, "Never wake a sleeping baby". I can now officially laugh at that now. If you have a baby who could sleep all day (yes, that would be Ives) and your breast feeding her, let's not talk about how much pain and discomfort you feel after about 3 hours if she doesn't nurse.... So yes, I will wake her.

* Most preemies often times have a bigger problem of spitting up after they've eaten, and especially when you have a child with a GI problem. This can also constitute to the pile of laundry she accumulates. More often than not I end up wearing her recycled food, and that's ok :)

* Yes, there really is such a thing as Grunting Baby Syndrome. It mostly involves preemies and could last for up to 10 weeks after birth. She wakes us up a lot with her mindless grunting - which sounds like a chain smoker, haha! Don't take it personally if she grunts at you a lot, it's her way of expressing that she doesn't understand what's going on with her digestive system.

* Your Mom and Mother-in-law (Mema and Nonna in Iveys case) expect daily pictures of their precious. It's funny and I really don't mind. Iveys so blessed and so loved.

* If you already had a close relationship with your Mom, that increases ten-fold when you have a baby of your own. Love you, Mom :)

* You start thinking more about what you usually do... Such as, what you watch on TV, what you listen to on the radio, how you spend your time, how you talk to your spouse or to anyone. Constantly thinking about how that effects your child and how you want to improve it all. She's really a wonderful reminder :)

* Also, you no longer have a use for an alarm clock. Ever.

* it's WAY harder than I'd ever imagined it would be to just...let her cry. Earlier this week I sat in the floor next to her cradle in a puddle of tears willing myself to not pick her up. She screamed and wailed. She doesn't like sleeping in her cradle.  She loves to cuddle but we are trying to teach her that at bed time she sleeps in her cradle. With much perseverance and patience and tears, she has slept in her cradle for 4 consecutive nights! It's not without a period of about 15 to 20 minutes that she doesn't 'cry it out' though. It's a process and we are proud of her for the progress she has made :)

* Now, if we could only get her detached from her passie... But that's a whole 'nother issue, haha!

She Is Not Mine

12:30am I get up to feed Ives. She has a crazy talent of being able to eat and sleep at the same time. The night light in her nursery gently lights her precious face. I stare at her as she eats and sleeps. So peaceful.

She is home now and my heart is full. We spend our days eating and napping and we squeeze in some play time when we are both awake enough. Its perfect. It feels so "official" now that she is home. We are a family of 3. She belongs to us and us to her. She is ours.....and yet, she is not. She is not ours. She is not mine. She is a gift. She has been lent to us from Whom she belongs.

She is not mine, she is His.

Why He chose us, I don't know. But I am honored to be her Mama. She is a baby, she is a precious doll, she is a girl, she is my daughter. But when I think about her being a soul, I feel unworthy - I am unworthy. He has in trusted us to raise this soul. Wow.

She is a soul. She is not mine, she is His.

As I think about the choices Trent and I will make as we raise her - the big choices or the everyday decisions, remembering.... She is not ours, she is His.

Ivey is a precious little girl. She has cute pink clothes galore. Cute bows, cute shoes, you name it. True, it is fun to dress her up, but then I remember there's more than a cute face. She is a soul and what impact am I choosing to have on this precious soul?

As Ivey gets older and I'm daily teaching her about her dress and conduct as a young lady, what am I motivated by?

She is not mine, she is His.

When we are trying to decide what path to take to educate her (whether that be public, private, or homeschool), remembering....She is not mine, she is His.

We get so distracted by life and we become consumed with our electronic entertainment and screens that we forget about the soul. I do not want to be distracted by what is meaningless and forget the importance of the soul that I am raising. Am I giving my full attention to her- that which is His?

I pray that if we raise her with an understanding of  'She is not mine, she is His', then when she is grown and making her own decisions, she will say to herself:  I am not mine, I am His.

Help me to always remember, Lord, that she is not mine, but she is Yours and help me rise to that privilege with my whole heart and may I always glorify you with how I raise what is Yours. 

Mom Brain

And so it begins. I watched it effect other moms, even my own mother. I was told it would happen to me, I knew it was coming. And now it's here. This Mom Brain is really a thing.

My daughter is still in the NICU, she isn't even home yet. Still, it's overcome me. I still have late nights and early mornings and get up in the middle of the night to pump. I don't get up for a screaming baby but I'd trade anything for that. Some might tell me I'd take that back once she comes home and I do have to deal with a screaming baby, but no, I wouldn't. At 2am I sit and pump and think about my little girl wishing she was closer, wishing I could just walk over to her crib and check on her, hoping she is having a good night and thinking about being able to see her the next morning.

It's kinda like walking in a fog. When people talk sometimes it sounds like the parents on Charlie Brown, "wah, wah, wah, blah, wah wah". We had some friends come visit us and Ivey the other day at the NICU (she loves having visitors).  I was holding Ivey and feeding her her bottle and trying to keep her tubes all untangled... I was distracted. I tried to be engaged in the conversation, I wanted to be. I listened... Or tried to.  I was so glad our friends came to visit and I wanted to catch up with them. But on the ride home from the hospital I recalled having to ask Trent some questions about how our friends were doing because, I really didn't comprehend the conversation. Mom Brain. It's hard to fight. You don't even know it's happening. I lose things, I miss place things, and yes I did this way before I was a Mom.... But it's ten times worse.

Sometimes you're just incoherent. Everything's kinda muffled. Maybe it's because I'm new at this, or maybe it will get worse as time goes on and more kids come. I'm hopeful of learning to handle it with grace like so many experienced moms do. One day.

Even though I have Mom Brain, I still try, I still care, even though things are cloudy... I just gotta try harder than normal. It's learning the balance of being attentive to your child(ren) but not making them think they're the center of the universe. I have a lot of learning to do.

So if I ask you the same question multiple times, or forget your name, or appear to be in another world why you're talking, or while im talking, I'm sorry... I'm still working on getting the hang of all this. And I love all this. I love this mom thing. 



Update on Ivey:  our sweet girl is doing so well. She has been taking a special kind of hypo-allergenic  formula for about a week now. Due to a bloody stool 2 weeks ago, the Doctors think she was allergic to the milk proteins in my breast milk. I've gone on a dairy-free diet in hopes of her being able to tolerate my milk again so that I can nurse her. This weekend they are slowly going to start giving her my now lactose free milk to see if she tolerates it. If she does well, they hope to send her HOME this Wednesday. If she has another bloody stool, that will be another set back and we'll probably have to start over again with the feedings. Please pray that she can tolerate the breast milk. That's our biggest worry right now.... We are so ready to have her home! We are so thankful for all the  continued words of encouragement, cards, texts, hugs, meals, and especially your prayers. This journey has been a little easier with the comfort from our brethren. God is good. And His family is good.

- Rebekah

Our Bundle of Joy!

In the words of my mom, "y'all've added a little person to your 'Faris wheel of life' ". And of course, we couldn't be more thrilled to have our little Ivey Joy finally here!

Ivey Joy Faris 

Born June 13th

5lbs 9oz. 18in. 

Because of so many peoples prayers, Iveys strong perseverance, and Gods mercy, she has overcome so many obstacles in just her first week here. We are so humbled by what our mighty Lord can do. We had prepared ourselves for everything the doctors had been telling us for months and The Lord has opened many doors. We were told that Iveys intestines would be put into a "silo" bag for 4 to 7 days before they could do the surgery to close up her Gastroschisis.... She was doing so well they did her surgery that night right after she was born.  For a few weeks they said that she would be immediately transported to the Children's  (Egleston) campus for her surgery and recovery. The night she was born we were informed that the Egleston campus' NICU was so full they had no room for Ivey; this was a huge blessing because she would remain at Scottish Rite which is next to Northside and also closer to our home!

In less than a week our little trooper was breathing so well on her own they removed her ventilator. She is now off all of her pain medicine and is only taking an IV drip. She still has a tube that collects her bowel secretion and we are hoping that that will eventually clear-up and that tube can be removed from her mouth....which is really the next step we are waiting on. Once that tube is removed they can slowly begin her feedings (which is the longest process) - praying she takes those well!

It's amazing how you can start to see her little personality already. She is super feisty and a strong little goober. She loves being sung to and having her head rubbed. She HATES baths. She loves being snuggled :) We say this a lot but we cant thank you enough for all the prayers for Ivey and for us as well. There are people we have never even met that have been praying for our family and we are so grateful. Please continue to pray for little Ives and that soon her stomach tube can be removed so that she can begin feedings and also that her bowels tolerate her feedings.

We continue to covet your prayers.

- Trent & Bekah

Update On Baby Ivey

Our little munchkin is growing and as active as ever.  She keeps me busy with eating, sleeping, and doctors visits.  We had 3 doctors visits this week. Monday Ivey had another stress test, Wednesday we met with her pediatric surgeon, and today went to see her perinatal specialist for her weekly ultrasound.

Wednesday we found out that she will definitely be moved by ambulance to Children's in Atlanta as soon as she is born. Of course, I didnt really want to hear that my little girl will be moved to a completely different hospital, but I am thankful that Trent will be able to go with her and I know that at Children's she will get the best care that she needs. Her pediatric surgeon has told us to prepare for her to stay in the Children's NICU anywhere from one to two months.... We have expected this for a few months now.

Today during her perinatal ultrasound they weren't able to get good measurements because she was in  a little ball face down - one of her favorite positions. My little Rolly Polley :) they were very pleased with her breathing.... She was doing well with her "practice breathing" and her heart rate was 165. This is good. However, today they did notice some changes. Her small and large intestines are inflamed.  They were also able to see the hole were the Gastroschisis is and it was fairly big. They also saw that her stomach was also trying to come out as well. These are all not uncommon for babies with this birth defect, and they are confident in her situation especially since her "practice breathing", heart rate, and activity have been very good.

But because Ivey's intestines are now inflamed and her stomach is trying to come out as well, they will induce at 37 weeks (if I have not gone into labor on my own before then). Please pray that we can make it to 37 weeks - naturally it would be best for Ivey to stay in as long as possible to get as much development and nourishment as she can. Please pray that she continues to grow in strength, she's definitely a tough little cookie. It helps ease our minds knowing that she is perfectly happy and in no discomfort.

We know that all of this is in our Lords hands and He will protect our baby girl in the ways He sees fit. There are so many things that are uncertain and that change from week to week with this situation. Thankful for our God who never changes or moves in our times of trials. He is constant.


We are thankful for your continued prayers.

Happenings in Georgia

It's been a couple weeks since I've written an update, so it's about time. We are all moved into our new home in Norcross and we LOVE it! Getting used to the traffic and the fact you can't get anywhere in a short amount of time.... We are in no small town anymore.  We are excited that there is so much to do here! And big-belllied-mama loves having access to a pool daily ;)

We are also beginning our routine weekly doctors visits to keep up with Ivey. Once a week we go to my OB and also to her specialist. At the OB they give Ivey a stress test (which she passed this week with flying colors) and at her specialist they monitor her through ultrasound and keep an eye on her bowels and growth.  This week it showed that her small bowel is out and also 1.6cm of her large bowel is out. This is good that it's only her bowels that are out which also means the plan is still a natural delivery.

Today during her ultrasound she looked like she was trying to talk to us. She had her lips all puckered up and was opening and closing her mouth.... And then she stuck her tongue out at us!  That little goober is so precious.  We also found out today that there is a good possibility of inducing at 37 weeks.  We learned that they prefer to deliver the babies a little smaller because this makes it easier for them to deal with the Gastroschisis outside of the womb. We meet with Ives pediatric surgeon specialist next Wednesday to discuss her procedure and what to expect. He will also advise us, based on her current condition,  whether he would like her to come at 37 weeks or wait a couple weeks later. It's hard to imagine the time is almost here to meet our bundle of Joy!

We are so thankful for your continued prayers and concerns. We know that our Father is in control and our trust is in Him no matter what.
I ask that you keep my friend Megan, her husband Seth, and their sweet son Joses in your prayers. If you haven't read their story yet you can read it here. They have been such a huge encouragement to so many.  We continue to pray for Gods comfort and peace upon them both.

Update on Ivey Joy.... " When is Your Baby Due? "

This is a question I get asked A LOT. Especially now that I am in my 3rd trimester and the weeks are getting closer and closer to Ivey's arrival. When we found out we were expecting, my doctor gave me the estimated due date of July 12th. After finding out about Ivey's condition we were then told that date is pretty much irrelevant when it comes to when she is "due".

Because of Ivey's Gastroschisis, the 3rd trimester is crucial for her. This is the time babies really start to absorb nutrients and gain fat. Sometimes, babies with this birth defect do not grow in the 3rd trimester like they are supposed to and/or their bowels become inflamed. They monitor her more during this time and next week when I hit 32 weeks they will start doing weekly ultrasounds to keep a good eye on her. If for some reason she is not making the progress that she should be, they will "pull her"....now, whether or not that means they induce me and I go for a natural delivery or they do a c-section really all depends on Ivey. If she is handling things well, they encourage natural delivery. Because of the Gastroschisis, they will not allow me to exceed 39 weeks, at most - and that is if Ivey continues to do well. As of now, she is doing GREAT and thankfully has an appetite like her Daddy and she is gaining weight well for her condition.

So really, Ivey could come at any time! So when Gods ready for Ives to enter the world, that's her "due date".

Prayers for our family as we move to Atlanta next week and prepare our hearts and home for Ivey to come. We go see her new specialist in ATL on the 23rd, praying that she will still be doing well at that point.

You can keep up with Ivey through this blog; I will be posting periodically and probably will be using this for updates through out her stay at the NICU. We are so thankful for all the prayers, cards, texts, and words of encouragement. Our heavenly Father is faithful.


Rebekah

40 #PregnancyProblems

Humorous observations through-out my pregnancy:

1)  you can never have too many pillows.  (Boppy, I love you)
2)  2am snacks are common.
3)  or 4am breakfast.... And then second breakfast at 7am.
4)  leg cramps are a real thing and are not my favorite.
5)  thankful to have a husband who can sleep through a hurricane because a lot of nights I'm up and down and up and tossing and turning.
6)  getting up 3 times through out the night to pee is normal.
7)  you never realize how much you loved sleeping on your tummy until you can't anymore.
8)  sometimes breathing can be difficult.
9)  you actually debate on whether or not it's worth it to sit on the couch because getting up is an adventure.
10)  thankful it's finally sandal weather because my feet can breathe when they swell.
11)  baked chicken is nasty.
12) chick-fil-a chicken nuggets are more than acceptable. And so is their sweet tea.
13) chick-fil-a lemonade, oh my goodness.
14)  I can't turn down a smoothie, Icee, slushy, or ice cream. If it's cold, I'm on it.
15)  at some point you go through the stage where people give you the 'not sure if she is pregnant or just ate a lot' look.
16)  I'm happy to be out of that stage.
17)  strangers touching your belly really happens.
18)  random people will hold you up in the grocery store asking you when you are due, if it's a boy or girl, what their name is, where you live and your social security number... Ok, the last 2 aren't true but you get the point.
19)  yes, there are real people who can't believe you would choose to breast feed. As if God didn't know what He was doing or anything....
20)  naps. naps are my life.
21)  I can sleep anywhere at anytime.
22)  bonus: you don't miss your monthlies. Hallelujah.
23)  getting down to sit on the floor is just not an option.
24)  I now have the attention span of a 2 year old.  It really is hard to focus most times.
25)  watermelon, I love thee.
26)  doctors offices are like your second home... At least it is in my case, 2 visits each month.
27)  ultrasounds are awesome. I love seeing Ivey so much.
28)  sometimes you wonder if there is a monster inside of you or a karate kid.
29)  Ivey doesn't play when it comes to kicking my bladder. She thinks it's funny or something.
30)  dropping the keys or a sock on the floor is a tragedy.
31)  there comes a time when you have that one cami that refuses to corporate with the new belly and you walk around like Pooh with your tummy out. The struggle.
32)  where did my belly button go?
33)  yes, people will be surprised when you tell them you plan to stay at home with the baby after it's born. And yes,  - oh my goodness - I actually WANT to.  Take me back to the 50's.
34)  working out is HARD when you swallowed a 3lb watermelon.
35)  you get hot. A lot.
36)  talking to your baby is the best.
37)  you can literally sit for hours and just watch your tummy. It's kinda awesome.
38)  laughing is great. But sometimes not so great.....
39)  sneezing is a no no.
40)  it's all WAY worth it.

Enjoy one of my favorite clips from The Office here.

The problem with my generation: "Hippie Love".....

Courage - The quality of mind or spirit that enables a person to face difficulty, danger, pain, etc. without fear; bravery.

Goodness - Moral excellence; virtue; generosity.

My generation lacks the true knowledge of these two words.

Let me first say that when I say "my generation" I am speaking from a worldly stand point. My generation, as a nation, as a whole. I am thankful and blessed to know and be so close to those of my generation who are my brothers and sisters in Christ who are goodness and live a life for Him.

My generation cowards behind what I like to refer to as.... The "Hippie Love". This kind of love is spreading and sadly becoming a norm. Let me try and define this kind of love.... where do I begin? This love is the "peace and blessings" love. That ALL is wonderful and their is no wrong. We should accept everything and everyone because no matter what anyone is doing, it's all for love. We do not point out the wrong because that is not love. This love encourages you to fall into the crowed and just follow. Whatever you choose in life is for your happiness and we should all just love you for it. "Hippie Love" holds no responsibility or accountability, because at the end of the day we should all just love each other. This love is all about not "offending" anyone. This love does not show humility. The problem is, my generation is listening to this kind of love and they are accepting it. If by now you aren't picking up on what exactly this kind of love is, then you should just stop reading.

"Hippie Love" is not true love. It is not AGAPE love. It is not a selfless love, it is every bit of a selfISH love. This lie-of-a-love holds no pure goodness. It has no worth. It encourages you to "just roll with anything, man". It does not encourage any true conviction of any kind. It is a cowards love. This kind of love paints everything gray. This love will be the downfall of us.

This country was not founded by men who didn't listen to this kind of love. These men had back-bones. They wanted to learn more of goodness and virtue and they stood for it. They fought for goodness. They had humility. They had courage. They respected our Heavenly Father and feared Him. These people did not just do these courageous things, but they taught these courageous things. These men offended people daily - (and please note what I mean by "offending" people, we can't step on people toes and say what they believe in is wrong because heaven forbid we offend them, this is the kind of "Hippie Love" that is suffocating.) Our society has twisted what "offended" means.  If men had listened to this kind of putrid lie, we would never have had men like Abraham Lincoln or Ronald Reagan. We wouldn't have had a C.S. Lewis. These men are human and are great with their own short-comings. But most importantly we wouldn't have had people like Paul, Barnabas, Timothy, David, and Daniel, just to name a few....

These men revered the Holy One. These men had a rock they built their life on. Their purpose was much greater than themselves and they spoke words of life. This "Hippie Love" stuff is built on sand, it has no truth. It has no hope and we will all crumble if we just "go along with it". Instead of just saying we disagree we must stand for the GOOD. We often say what we are against but how about we stand for what is and what is everlasting? How about we live our lives with virtue and don't coward down. We need to blot-out the evil with truth. Because the "Hippie Love" is wrong - there is truth, there is a right and wrong. If you stand with Christ you will offend people. Christ offended people. "It is not the popular thing to stand for whats right", this is something my parents would tell me when I was little and it's every bit true.

" The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing". - Edmund Burke


P.S. If you read this and were offended, well.........

Live Beautifully

Recently, for Christmas, my Mom gave me a journal. Not just any regular ole journal, but it was a special journal to log my pregnancy journey and the happenings of the first few months after the baby is born. I'm really excited about it and Ive already covered the first several pages.

On the front of the journal it says, Live Beautifully. The other day I started thinking about what that meant. What does it mean to Live Beautifully? Many people would have different ideas of what it means. Some would say to travel the world and live free, because of course, that's beautiful. Some would say just have fun and enjoy yourself. Others would say just do what you love and make yourself happy - whatever that takes.

I have seen a lot of people live, what I would call, beautiful lives....
 My parents. I would say they have lived extraordinary beautiful lives. Not because it has been perfect. Not because they have traveled all over the world (okay, maybe the country). But because they chose to serve. They have lived a life of service. They have lived a life of happiness, even when at times happiness isn't so easy. They have lived a life for our Father and they have shared that with others. That is a beautiful life.

The elderly couple I see at Barnes and Noble all the time. I have no idea what they might have encountered in their life, tragedy or struggle. But they sit together and they read together. I see them laugh and hold hands. They are content. And this is Beautiful.

The family with 4 children who run around in circles, with messes and screaming and running and playing. Life is hectic and sometimes crazy. But they teach their children. They teach them about their Creator and they teach them to pray. They teach them to love. And this is Beautiful.

These are just a few of so many I see Live Beautifully daily. But I think of the man who Lived Beautifully more than anyone, ever. His life was hard, and He had nothing. His family was not wealthy and He had no real home. He was not some educated scholar. He was a humble man who lived to serve (Matt. 20:28) and to teach. He lived His life simply. He was mocked and bullied and hated by many. Some wouldn't call that a beautiful life. But it truly was the most Beautiful. If someone doesn't know how to Live Beautifully, we have a wonderful Perfect example.

"But seek first the kingdom of God and His righteousness, and all these things shall be added to you."
                                                                                                                 - Matthew 6:33
"He has shown you, O man what is good; and what does the Lord require of you but to do justly, to love mercy, and to walk humbly with your God?"
                                                                                                                 - Micah 6:8

Let us Live Beautifully :)

A Pinterest Problem: Choosing The Easy Way Out

I will be the first to tell you: I love Pinterest. It's got some pretty awesome stuff on there, there's some helpful, some inspiring, and some funny that site has. I've got several boards all organized and put together. It's all because "I'm gonna need that someday, so I'll save it", haha. I've found some very helpful and insightful things on Pinterest. When I was doing gluten free I was able to get a lot of ideas and tips off there. When I broke my leg in March and sat on the couch for two months, it was entertaining. I've found some great homeschooling ideas on there, cute clothes, crocheting patterns, great meal recipes, witty sayings, beautiful pictures - you name it, you can find it on Pinterest.

Pinterest has its purpose. It can be useful for much good. But I feel like more than not, it can be a hindrance and a cop-out.  What does Pinterest feed us?
   - A picture of a "hot", tan, slim chick- who has to also have beautiful luscious hair -with a description that says "10 week challenge: 10 squats a day, 10 push ups, and a fruit and veggie diet".
  - ANOTHER picture of Ryan Gosling for girls "inspiration" during finals saying something like "I believe in you, babe".
  - The latest fashion of .... Wait for it.... Leggings and boots with everything.
  - Another picture of Peeta.
  - Another Harry Potter quote. (I'm not hating on HP, I love it).
  - "40 freezer meals in 2 hours"..... Which might have been the 100th one you've pinned. (I'm guilty).
  - "10 steps to organize your house fifteen minutes everyday"  (that one sold me).
I could go on fo dayyyzzz....

So you see a trend here? There's nothing wrong with these things on the surface. They're pretty harmless. Again, there really are things on Pinterest that are good and helpful, I've found some great things. As women we fall into this trap of "wow, one website to organize my life!" And then it becomes almost an obsession. Maybe you're not on everyday, but when you do log on you end up being on for hours (guilty again). We get caught up on searching and pinning "new and better ways to organize your closet" while you sit in front of your laptop or computer and your closets down the hall... As women, we get sold on the idea to make out lives better. Where's the action? No, not the click and pin. But the action of walking away and to get moving. What happened to women learning by trial and error and to learn what works best in your own home? Pinterest is easy. The answers sit there on this page of everyone else's ideas. That cute outfit you just pinned really isn't realistic because it's way out of budget when you're a college student scraping by. Pinterest plants the idea of not being content. Think about that for a moment......

One thing that I really started thinking about was the whole trendy meal idea on Pinterest. What's easiest? What's fastest? What can I prepare the most of in the least amount of time? I'm no mother of 4 trying to clean a house, give love and attention to the kids, being attentive to the husband, all while making sure Johnny and Susie get to soccer practice, Bobbie practices the piano, and little Lucy decided to paint the wall with my lipstick. I'm aware that Pinterest holds ideas that are helpful for mothers, and that's grand. But what about take the time to prepare meals? I believe back when, that used to be the thing. Now it's a burden because we are just so busy. What about the time to teach the children to cook? I have some great memories in the kitchen with my mother, and I'm thankful. Cooking is a time for memory making and connection. Is this making any sense? Pinterest is an aid to  compartmentalize our busy lives so that we can make it more busy. Are we using it in that way?

I'm not trying to make anyone feel guilty for being on Pinterest. I'm still going to use it because I've seen some true good it offers. Every now and again let's re-evaluate our use of it. I chose Pinterest because I found it easier for me to sink into, but I reckon this problem can be in other social media. We just need to help each other and remind each other as Christians everything we do needs to have a purpose - and make it a good one :)

P.S. Thankful to so many who I've seen use Pinterest for a pure purpose and have used it for encouragement. Thank you :)
Happy New Year!