Learning to Appreciate: Don't Bite The Parenting Hand

As I was making my way to the main front isle of Target this morning to check-out I overheard an argument between a young girl (probably early college or late high school age) and her mother having it out in the middle of the store. The daughter was clearly annoyed and unhappy, with the apparent rolling of the eyes and disgust towards her mother. I stopped and started appearing as if I was looking at an item on one of the shelves and I listened. Call me a "Nosy Nancy", but with their volume and mannerisms, they sure weren't acting like they wanted to keep it between the two of them; and I have also seen this seen before, personally - kinda like standing on the outside looking into the past. So I listened. The daughter was in every way disrespectful, degrading, selfish, and hateful towards her mother with her words and tone. {Her mother was BUYING her daughter some clothes- there were already a couple of pairs of shoes in the basket and some make-up - but the daughter was complaining. She didn't like what her mother liked, it wasn't good enough} At first, I was shocked to see that the mother just stood there like nothing was going on and she just took it. But then modern-day reality struck and I thought, oh, this is how a lot of parents are these days....sadly.

I was really angry with the daughter. I wanted to say something and stand up for the mother. But if you know me and my personality, I'd never actually do that. I couldn't believe the daughter could treat her own mother that way. How could she! But then I stopped dead in my thoughts. I was once that daughter. I was once that ungrateful and hateful daughter.  I have treated my own mother that way when I was in high school. I am guilty of the same exact thing. I just wanted to walk up to the mother and hug her, and tell her it would be okay. I wanted to tell her that hopefully someday-someday her daughter will get it. That someday her daughter will say, thank you mama. That someday her daughter will hug her instead of yell at her and snub her off. That right now her daughter doesn't want much to do with her unless she wants something, but someday she will call her just to talk. Or she will call just to say THANK YOU.

In high school sometimes my Mom embarrassed me and my Dad "cramped my style". I thought they were too involved in my life and  I didn't understand why they cared so much (I reckon its safe to say everyone has felt that way about their parents at one time or another). Now, I can't get enough hugs. I can't get enough advice. I wish I had taken advantage of their wisdom instead of pushed it away. Hold onto the "lectures" that your Dad gives you, because there will come a time when you can't sit at his feet and listen to his wisdom very often.

              Why do we bite the hand that feeds us? We do that not only to our parents, but we do it to our Almighty Father as well. We are ungrateful children in many ways.

Soak up the NOW. Listen to your parents advice NOW. Hug them NOW. Spend time with them NOW. Just randomly tell them THANK YOU. Honor them. Appreciate them. Be GRATEFUL for them. 

...........I wish I could have told that daughter these things.

We need to encourage children to do this - to WANT to be with their parents sometimes. As children and high schoolers we are encouraged to want to be with our friends our own age and we complain about being with our parents - "its boring". They need to know the value of truly spending time with their parents, I think that helps with them understanding appreciation. They need to learn the wonderful VALUE of that time.

I feel like this post as been kinda all over the place and I am sorry. I took for granted all the opportunity I had with my Mama and now she is my best friend and I am learning to understand it all, to appreciate, to value, to honor her. Go home and love your Mother. Go and hug your Dad. Every opportunity say THANK YOU. If you are fortunate enough, they will become some of your very best, dearest friends one day. :)

"Children, obey your parents in the Lord for this is right. Honor your father and mother, which is the first commandment with promise: "That it may be well with you and you may live long on the earth" ."

            Ephesians 6:1 - 3.

Our Martha Agenda's While Our Mary Hearts Thirst.

As a wife who is trying to always keep the house in order and inviting, prepping meals, and constantly trying to figure out the best and most efficient way to organize this cracker jack small-of-a-house, I sometimes feel like everything is spinning and I just can't keep up as I do this and also work. I make list after list of things to be done. I dusted an inch of dust off of our bedroom furniture and thought to myself I just dusted this a little over a week ago, how can there be this much dust? How does the laundry pile up so quickly?.... Oh, and there are only 2 people in this household. Somehow I just smile because I deeply love all of this and think how I can't wait to add little faces to this chaos, Lord willing - someday. As women, through our constant battle to keep our homes in order, it's never ending, there is always something that needs to be done. If we stop for just a day, there are things that get backed-up. And we thirst for something more...

Lately, I have been thinking about how this in some ways parallels with our spiritual walk. If we don't regularly "check-in"on ourselves and re-access ourselves things can get nasty. We cannot take a break from the MOST important thing.  Am I as diligent to regulate and grow in my prayer to my Lord as I am to vacuum consistently in our home? We are so crazy-focused on making our homes presentable when we know company is coming, but I fail in working on my hearts presence before my Father. We set goals for the cleanliness of our homes, but are we as ardent to do so in the growth of our faith?

A clean home is important, for sure. But perspective and priorities need to constantly be in-check. This is something I'm in much need to work on, but I also know I am not the only woman who battles this from time to time. May we remind each other it's not about this earthly home as much as it is about our heavenly Father and our hearts towards Him, daily. And let us hydrate ourselves on the Words of LIFE. 

Sometimes I just need to read this a few times, over and over. 

Luke 10:38 - 42.

Washing Each Others Feet

      Recently I was brought back to some of my childhood memories. Being a 10 year old girl and having those knock-down-drag-outs with my younger sister, Anna. Boy, did we have a lot of those back in the day. From quite a young age my parents, from time to time, would used quite an odd form of punishment for this behavior between my sister(s) and I. With our young faces full of child-like hatred and crinkled noses of defiance, my mom or dad would send us to the bathroom. We knew what this meant. And at the time we absolutely hated it. We thought this form of punishment was gross, weird, and like I still believe to this day, odd. One of us would kneel down by the tub (not saying a word to one another of course, much tension still in the air) and the other would sit on the side of the tub with our bare feet inside and pants-legs rolled up. After turning the water on to warm and grabbing the bar of soap, one of us would start to scrub the others feet. Once finished, we would trade places. And so this, as odd as it may be, was one of our forms of punishment when my sisters and I quarreled.
     John 13:1-17, this scripture is when Jesus washes the disciples feet. I remember my Dad reading this to us a few times. "If I then, your Lord and Teacher, have washed your feet, you ought to wash one another's feet. For I have given you an example, that you should do as I have done to you. Most assuredly, I say to you, a servant is not greater than his master; nor is he who is sent greater than he who sent him. If you know these things, blessed are you if you do them." (vs.14-17). Christ was the ultimate example of humility. Though most don't go around literally washing each others feet, to a young child, my parents used this as a way of showing us that it's not about "me". They used the washing of each others feet as a tool to show us it's about SERVING one another. My sister and I would often get into arguments because we each were being selfish in some way, this "gross" action of having to wash each others feet was teaching us a deeper meaning not for that present moment only, but as we grew older as well. 
   How can we wash each others feet today? How can we serve someone? Paul tells the brethren at Philippi, "let nothing be done through selfish ambition or conceit, but in lowliness of mind let each esteem OTHERS better than himself. Let each of you look out not only for his own interest, but also for the interest of OTHERS." (Phil. 2:3-4). The more we give of ourselves and humble ourselves, the more we learn about Christ. Let's LOOK for ways to wash each others feet and to SERVE. I myself, have much to learn in this way. I am thankful my parents sought to teach this value to my sisters and me - and showed us through their actions as well. 
I am reminded of the hymn we sometimes sing: 
           Lord, help me to live from day to day in such a self-forgetful way
          That even when I kneel to pray my prayers shall be for -Others.
          Others, Lord, Yes others, let this my motto be, help me to live for
          Others, that I may live like Thee.....